Well, in this case I think you had some work-related issues so that you forgot about the date. Or something else, at least, came up that distracted you from that. (Am I right?) Do you think that subconsciously you were trying to avoid it, or did you genuinely forget? It sounds to me like that's the question you're asking yourself--true/false? If so, consider this: Did you really want to go on that date? If you have doubts, then maybe you didn't, in which case you may be feeling more guilty about not letting him know than actually standing him up.
Otherwise, don't sweat it too much! Hopefully you'll be forgiven, and you can try again and this time, make a special note somewhere so that you won't forget even if you try. :)
Well, you see, there is this certain thing called a filter. When thinking, this lovely bit of equipment is supposed to send off warning signals that perhaps the course of action that your brain is planning for you will not lead to the most favourable results.
However, this filter is easily distracted by excessive thinking, strong emotions, lack of sleep, and any number of chemicals that might have entered your body, most anything else (to quote Brian "ooh, shiny")
It wasn't exactly a date -- this is Andy of the naked men and fish calendar (http://www.livejournal.com/users/electricland/162261.html). Who is a valued if slightly strange friend and former co-worker, and who really deserves better of me.
Aside from that, you are probably entirely right. Thanks...
(Oh, and that little fishy red light you gave me has proven to be much more useful than you could have possibly imagined when you bought it, so thanks again.)
more specifically, here's how it happened: he suggested lunch on Friday. I had a client coming in so wouldn't be able to make it and suggested another day. Much back-and-forth as to date, time and location. We more or less settled on Saturday at a place near me, but hadn't confirmed or settled on a time by the time I left work for the weekend. Rather than do the sensible thing (email back to say "I'm leaving work now, but call me at this number to confirm and I'll see you tomorrow") I left it at that, vaguely assuming that if he did show up he would either drop by my apartment (where I have lived for five and a half years; he's been there) or call me (I'm in the phone book and I'm the only person with my last name in the Montreal phone book, so I'm not hard to find). But he did neither of these things, so I didn't go, and I got in to work on Monday to see 3 emails from him -- two agreeing on where to meet, one with a "Where were you?" subject line. Naturally, since I didn't quite have a plan for dealing with this, I did my best to ignore it for four days.
*deepsigh*
So I don't feel altogether guilty about standing him up, but I do rather wish I'd answered the email right away. Thus does my mind work.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2004-03-18 07:58 pm (UTC)Ah.
Date: 2004-03-18 08:03 pm (UTC)Re: Ah.
Date: 2004-03-18 08:17 pm (UTC)Otherwise, don't sweat it too much! Hopefully you'll be forgiven, and you can try again and this time, make a special note somewhere so that you won't forget even if you try. :)
Re: Ah.
Date: 2004-03-19 09:07 am (UTC)However, this filter is easily distracted by excessive thinking, strong emotions, lack of sleep, and any number of chemicals that might have entered your body, most anything else (to quote Brian "ooh, shiny")
Don't blame yourself. Blame your lazy filter.
Re: Ah.
Date: 2004-03-21 08:38 am (UTC)Re: Ah.
Date: 2004-03-21 08:41 am (UTC)Aside from that, you are probably entirely right. Thanks...
Re: Ah.
Date: 2004-03-21 10:47 am (UTC)(Oh, and that little fishy red light you gave me has proven to be much more useful than you could have possibly imagined when you bought it, so thanks again.)
Re: Ah.
*deepsigh*
So I don't feel altogether guilty about standing him up, but I do rather wish I'd answered the email right away. Thus does my mind work.
/way, way too much detail