electricland

I'm subscribed to the CP feed for the next two weeks. I foresee that it will be a rich source of entertainment. Or something. Like this story it pointed me to:

Horror attack on child forces family to kill cat

Margo Dawson says her family had no choice but to shoot a cat to death after its companion attacked her 16-month-old granddaughter Emma.

"The cat just jumped on top of her head and wouldn't let go," said Dawson.

"I screamed and kicked the cat in the butt to get it away. Emma was hysterical - she had cuts on her ears and the back of her head."

Serenity, the cat that attacked Emma, ran away and hid before the family could shoot her, said Dawson.

But Serenity's companion, Faith, was "hissing and growling" and Dawson's family decided she too should be shot.

"So we went after her and shot her."

Faith and Serenity were among five cats Dawson's family took into their Beaumont-area home about two weeks ago after responding to an ad offering cats free to a good home.

Dan Tanguay, the cats' former owner, contacted the Sun this week after finding Faith shot to death outside the home of the family they'd given her to.

Tanguay said he and his girlfriend Krista were forced to give up Serenity and her three five-and-a-half-week-old kittens because Serenity didn't get along with his dog Storm.

He sent along Faith to be a companion for Serenity.

Tanguay said he got a call Monday morning from the cats' new owner who said Serenity had attacked his one-year-old daughter and was now hiding in the rafters of a building.

Tanguay offered to come out to the acreage and call Serenity out. When he and Krista got there they made the grisly discovery of a dead, frozen Faith.

Dawson said the family left Faith outside because they'd been at the hospital all night with Emma, who she said received six stitches in her head.

She said Serenity "got spooked," and broke into a crazed run throughout the house before jumping on Emma.

"Emma was defenceless - the blood was just gushing."

Dawson said Serenity should never have been brought to the home, where there are "all kinds of animals," if she couldn't get along with Tanguay's dog.

"We had to do what we had to do to save little Emma. I would do it again."

The Alberta SPCA says there's nothing against the law in shooting your own animal providing it's done humanely, and a gunshot is an accepted means of euthanasia.

(All emphases mine. I should mention that the CP story is considerably less purple than the Edmonton Sun.)

So, children, what have we learned from this? I would suggest:
1. It's an excellent idea to bring five animals at once into your home.
2. Especially if you have a toddler.
3. And especially without asking why the animals are being given away.
4. If you can't track down and kill the animal that hurt your small child, another will do just as well! Really!
5. And then you can blame someone else for inflicting this savage animal on your household.
6. Giving pets away free is a wonderful way to find them a loving, caring, knowledgeable new home.

And what is UP with Alberta? (or at least its SPCA?)